The Fuzz

I got pulled over today. What a heart-stopping experience that is. Jen (who was in the car with me) keeps attempting to comfort me by recalling that it was an absolutely classic pull over.

So we were on our way home from outlet shopping in Primm (and though it wasn’t a very successful shopping experience, it was still good to get out). I’d never been on that road before, but it was just another of those endless, straight, in-the-middle-of-the-desert roads (or so I thought). No Nevadans ever obey the speed limit on those roads, which is usually 75 anyways, so when I got stuck behind this guy who was going wicked slow I (after shouting “Dude, why don’t you go a little slower!”) pulled into the other lane to pass him. A Beach Boys song comes on and I crank it up really loud as I look in my rearview mirror to see if I’m far enough ahead of Mr. Turtle to get back in the slow lane. There’s a pickup truck behind me with lights on it. I point this out to Jen and comment that maybe the copper is the reason why that guy was going so slowly, but think to myself it’s probably just a volunteer ambulance guy, because police cars are usually cars and not pickup trucks.

Then his lights go on. MAN. Isn’t that just THE worst feeling in the world?!!?!? (Okay, well I can think of a few other feelings that might be worse, but getting pulled over makes me feel totally ill inside).

So I pull over, planning out what I’ll say in my head and silently sending prayers heavenward (though why anyone up there would even listen to a heathen like me, I’m not sure). The officer asks the standard questions: do you know what the speed limit is blah blah blah. He asks how long I’ve been here; I lie and say one week. He asks if I’m working; I lie and say “oh, for a couple of days now”. He tells us he’s on his way home for a two week vacation and then adds up the tickets I deserve for all the violations I’m commiting: 20mph over the speed limit=$300 fine plus two points on the brand new Nevada license that I need to get (in my spare time between work and night drivers classes that I’ll need to take), and driving without a valid state license in an unregistered, uninsured car would earn another $100 in fines at least. Oh Billy. That’s all I need right now.

All I have to say is: Thank God he had some serious R&R lined up.

He didn’t give me any tickets, just a warning to be a good Nevadan citizen and get all that car stuff taken care of and slow down. What a relief (not that I wasn’t tremoring violently as he walked back to his truck).

But I have to ask: what state has police officers who drive pickups?! I think that’s kind of shady right there. And B, he totally peeled out of the shoulder and zoomed at least 80mph down the road after thouroughly reprimanding me for going too fast.

But I’m not complaining.

A Peek Inside Bouchon, and Some Tips for Survival

Pictures from Sean & Erica’s Wedding.

bouchon_napkin.jpgOur walk-in refrigerator is seriously impressive; a gleaming food library of shiny beveled steel and smart plastic containers. It surpasses by 200% every restaurant refrigeration system I’ve ever seen in terms of organization and cleanliness. There is a place for everything and everything MUST go in it’s proper place.

All products are stored in brand new plastic cambros with color coordinating lids or in deli containers–no other container is acceptable for storage. These storage containers must be properly labelled, dated and initialed with green tape, and this label placed approximately one inch from the top of the lid on the front side of the container.

We categorize the shelves, so there’s a shelf for herbs, a separate one for vegetables, yet another for lettuces, condiments, prepared foods, etc., and a separate walk-in entirely for seafood and meat, another for beverages, a third for dairy and one last for bakery products. Everything is alphabetized from top to bottom, left to right. Heaven forbid one of the upper-level chefs (in our complicated hierarchy of chefdom) should find your initials on an improperly stored product!! If you see something in the walk-in that has been improperly stored or that has not been consolidated, you fix it. Even if you’re not the one that screwed it up in the first place. It is the responsibility of each chef to take the walk-in’s sanitation personally.

There are blue aprons and there are white aprons at Bouchon (I’m a blue apron). A white apron means that that particular chef is an intern or recent hire on a probationary period. And though you treat everyone with the utmost respect, blue always outweighs white. It is important to make the rounds every morning when you arrive and every evening before you leave. This involves saying hello/goodnight and shaking hands (when possible) with everyone (from dishwashers to Executive Chef) in the kitchen, and thanking them for their help at the end of the day. Always address everyone as Chef (Insert First Name Here), or you are in breach of the Bouchon Code of Inter-Personal Communications (read: not giving your co-workers the Respect they deserve as employees of this fine establishment).

Question yourself endlessly. Consider why everything is where it is. Does it belong there? Is there a better home for it? Fix it. Clean it. Do it the Right Way.

Never have idle hands; there’s always something else that needs to be done. When in doubt, clean, organize, consolidate.

Bouchon is an upscale French bistro, but it still amazes me how many people speak French in the kitchen! On the line during service if something goes especially well, one of the chefs will exclaim “Viva la France!” and the rest of us enthusiastically echo it down the line. If a Chef asks you to do something, most often the response is “Oui, Chef.” Several of the waitstaff communicate in French and a few of the chefs regularly thank me (“Merci, mon cher”) in that musical language (I envy their beautifully perfect accents).

On a slow morning we serve breakfast to about 180 people, on a busy day up to 300. At dinner they do about 220 on a regular night, so all in all, we’re doing at least 400 covers a day–that’s where all of this militant organization comes in handy! Even though it may sound like kitchen bootcamp, everyone is extremely friendly and the kitchen emanates a positive, upbeat aura of success; it’s not quite as intimidating as it sounds!

In other news, the weather man changed his mind about it only being 98 degrees on Thursday. That’s right folks, triple digits all week long. Yippee! I can’t wait until monsoon season starts.

New Gallery

New to Hotshots: pictures from Phoebe’s Wedding.

Dude, I hate to complain, but here goes. This weather is killing me. Seriously. My hair is falling out, bloody noses every other day, chapped lips, parched lungs, dry eyes: my body can’t handle it!!

Cristina (my new friend!) and I were discussing the weather (we’re looking forward to Thursday, when it’s only supposed to reach ninety-eight degrees, a welcome change from the 105+ we’ve been experiencing lately: wahoo!!) on the maze out of work today. Commuting in Las Vegas hotels is ridiculous. Read on the maze: here’s how we get out of work everyday: down two flights of stairs into a hallway, make hairpin turns among large pipes to the locker room. Then go down another hallway and take an industrial elevator up one flight (no stairs in this area). This brings you to a hallway inside the hotel where the guest suites are. Next we walk down another corridor and take another, fancier elevator to the parking garage, cut through the garage to a back construction alley and take another flight of stairs down to the shuttle loading dock, where the shuttle picks us up and ferries us to our cars in a random open lot three blocks away.

In the car today I was absolutely dehydrated: so thirsty. I grab for the first bottle of water I see (habitually filled before leaving work in order to survive the hot and heinous car ride home) and accidentally grabbed an older bottle of water that I must have left in there yesterday. The water was so hot, I burnt all the tastebuds in my mouth!!! HELLOW. So not cool. 🙂

Tomorrow marks the dawn of my Explore Las Vegas Campaign. Cristina and I are going to the Guggenheim museum inside our hotel. (INSIDE our hotel: ha!). Wednesday I think I’m going to check out Caesar’s. Thursday and Friday are my days off this week and Jen and I have a date on Thursday night: outlet shopping in Primm (a wannabe Las Vegas town 15 minutes North of Henderson), and then dessert at Aureole. Talk about your social butterfly.

But really, life is great here. I love having my own place, my own space, and a real career in a new city! That part is totally fun and fabulous. I just need to flesh out the rest, and we’ll be all good.

Aqua

I sense a pet fish in my future. But after doing some research today, am not convinced I can aptly provide for a live aquarian creature! Building a mini ecosystem complex enough to support a life –in one little tank (or rather, one not so little tank)– is quite intimidating. But I found my dream fish Belthezar Jr. today and he’s on sale for only $6.99!! Oh the Temptation.

goldfish.jpgI’m so conflicted because I’m not sure I want to acquire a whole aquarium ecosystem and then have to move it when I leave. But the enjoyment and companionship Belthezar would surely bring would improve the quality of my life greatly. On the other hand, if I’m going to buy a fish, I want to improve the quality of his life too, you know? I don’t want him to be stuck swimming around in circles day after day, bored out of his mind. Unfortunately, this involves purchasing a 10 gallon fish tank, which certainly would not fit in my bathroom (where Belthy was planning on living).

Perhaps the bathtub could be a good resolution. Afterall, it’s already installed in the apartment! But then, taking a shower and whatnot could be a problem. Passion flower shampoo might be a little too girly for Belthy.

So then I found this portable, build-it-yourself pond with a fountain, which would be just fabulous! We could put it in the living room and swim/wade together while chatting about the day’s events. An added bonus: a refreshing dip within the comfort of our own home! But I’m not sure we’d still have room for a couch (if we ever buy one) with the large fountain in the middle of the room.

This is quite the dilemna! I’ll have to ponder the pros and cons some more…

Time Warp

epcot2.gifI miss being cold. Could it be cold just for a few minutes so I can wear a snuggly sweatshirt, please? I’m craving snow and crisp Autumn air, crunchy leaves and ice. It was in the upper 80s yesterday and WHAT a relief. We didn’t even have to turn the air conditioner on!! Can you imagine? I’ve been practicing positive visualization techniques extensively of late (snow drifts, polar bears, ski lifts…) and today managed to transport myself not only to another climate, but back in time!!! (Dum duh dum dum duuuuuuuummmmm) Here’s a break down:

*Telescoping back in time to 1994*

It’s 7th grade at LeRoy Jr./Sr. High School. Me and the girls (we all have nicknames that start with the letter S: Shiraz, Shanaynay, Shalami, Shanunu) are pumped for our upcoming Marching Band trip to Florida. Very pumped. We’re so excited that we decide to release some of our creative energy into a short novel documenting what we imagine the trip will be like. And so, The Florida Story is born.

We each write a chapter and pass it on for the others to read and write the consecutive chapter–there are 24 chapters by the time we’re done. The final product is of the romantic comedy/action adventure genre.

By the end of the novel, we’re trying to kill the others off and write ourselves in as the heroine. That’s where this picture of me on top of Epcot center comes in. After a tragical accident (I was attempting a quick getaway on a motorcycle with a new-found True Love when I fell in to a pool and got a concussion), I (Shiraz) end up at the hospital hooked up to an IV of Valium. I miraculously escape and (still hyped up on Valium) decide I need to go on the Spaceship Earth ride. The real story is so much more dramatic, here’s a little clip– Carrie writes:
She jumped off the ride, ran through a secret passage to a hatch that opened to the top of the golf ball and stood right on the top…(end of chapter)

I pick up with the next chapter…

So there I was, poised to jump off the giant golfball. I had just finished singing “Star Spangled Banner” when far down below I saw, nothing–it was really far down to the ground!

Meanwhile, Shanunu, Shanaynay and Shalane were in the cafe in France (at Epcot). They were sitting at a cute little cafe sipping cappucinos and eyeing the hotty across the aisle. All of a sudden he stood up and started walking towards them (obviously there was a major attraction!). He was so engrossed with the lovely ladies that he walked right into a gigundo clay pot with a palm tree in it. Woops! The girls jumped up and ran over to see if he was alright. The hottie looks into Shanaynay’s eyes and says, “Hi Gorgeous!” Shanaynay passes out because he is so absolutely groovy.

Suddenly, “OH NOOOO!! STOP!! DON’T DO IT!” screams Sazama (Shiraz’s new found love) when he sees Shiraz poised to jump off of the giant golf ball.
“Why not?” demanded Shiraz.
“BECAUSE I LOVE YOU! I CAN’T LIVE WITHOUT YOU! DON’T JUMP, PLEEEZZE SHIRAZ!! WITH A CHERRY ON TOP?”
Shiraz responds, “Okay, but not an artificial cherry because those are DISGUSTING!” But not knowing how to get down (the valium still affecting her), she jumps!!! (To Shalane and Shanunu’s great joy–with Shiraz out of the way, they are free to be the heroines). BUT ALAS!! Shiraz foils them again!! She had a bungee cord on! Oh HA HA!! The End.

I guess you need to have experienced the entire Florida Story sub-culture to really appreciate this poorly written humor…or perhaps you need to have read the entire story from start to finish. But, I thought this little segment was highly amusing.

For all interested, The Florida Story is also available on audio tape. That’s right, at our impromptu two-year reunion we each read a few chapters and recorded the entire mini-novel on audio casette–complete with sound effects and impersonations! I think it definitely has Hollywood Blockbuster potential, don’t you?